Thursday, February 17, 2005
i can't look into the mirror no more.
i cant see, hear myself like before.
can this be real?
that i am disappearing into the thin air
and seems like i can't hear you at all.
i am losing my touch
abandoning the beautiful memories that i had
for a life filled with facade and a tear-streaked face ...
how i wish
that all this is nothing but an unawaken dream
a nightmare that i will soon overcome
and very soon my soul will return
maybe one day,
i will be able to feel the wind in my hair
just like the day before i slipped and fell into the trap.
the hole of insecurity, shame and guilt.
twenty years of age.
living in this world for 7300 days.
i remain nothing but a fool.
something happened along the way,
what used to be happy was sad.
i can't really remember what exactly occured.
or maybe i choose to run away like a coward.
but i know i screwed my life real bad.
no matter how much i say
no matter how i explain
i will never make myself right
but dear friends,
thanks for being there,
when i needed you guys
and catch me just in time.
i feel loved.
and i love you guys too.
ain't it funny that i have so much love to give
yet no love for myself.
the love hate relationship is overwhelming
that sometimes i get so confused
that i can no longer be sure.
if i am the girl in your world.
i made it known at 8:48 PM
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